Listening With Our Wounds

LISTENING with OUR WOUNDS

          To enter into solidarity with a suffering person does not
           mean that we have to talk to that person about our own
           suffering. Speaking about our own wounds is seldom help-
           ful to someone who is in pain. A wounded healer is some-
           one who can listen to a person with pain without having to
           speak about his or her own wounds. When we have lived
           through a painful depression, we can listen with great at -
           tentiveness and love to a depressed friend without men -
           tioning our experience. Mostly it is better not to direct a
           suffering person's attention to ourselves. We have to trust
           that our own bandaged wounds will allow us to listen to
           others with our whole being. That is healing.

    From: BREAD for the JOURNEY
               A DAYBOOK
           of WISDOM and FAITH

   By: HENRI J. M. NOUWEN